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The Register

Columnists

Final step to put new website into production deleted it instead

Who, Me? 02:00 AM is not the time to ignore procedures and rely on a shortcut to do a tricky job
Columnists16 Feb 2026 |82

The Y2K bug delayed my honeymoon … by 17 years!

ON CALL Y2K More tales of apocalypse avoided - including in an animal testing lab - and the hard work that made that possible
Columnists02 Jan 2026 |66

When the lights went out, and the shooting started, Y2K started to feel all too real

On Call Y2K More millennial tech support tales from your fellow readers
Columnists29 Dec 2025 |70

IT team forced to camp in the office for days after Y2K bug found in boss's side project

On Call Y2K The lack of trust that leads to outsourcing can be expensive
Columnists26 Dec 2025 |75

New boss was bad, his attitude was ugly, so the tech team pranked him good

Who, Me? Mousey wouldn’t work, wah-wah-wah
Columnists22 Dec 2025 |132

Dev's last-day-of-contract code helped to crash app used by 350,000 people

Who, Me? Customer signed off and a remaining staffer triggered the mess
Columnists24 Nov 2025 |37

Microsoft exec finds AI cynicism 'mindblowing'

Opinion The tech is impressive. Shoehorning it into absolutely everything is not
Columnists21 Nov 2025 |174

Linux admin hated downtime so much he schlepped a live UPS during office move

On Call Somewhat daft scheme worked until it didn’t
Columnists21 Nov 2025 |141

AI music has finally beaten hat-act humans, but sounds nothing like victory

Opinion Top of the slops signposts the undiscovered country for an industry
Columnists17 Nov 2025 |70

Developer made one wrong click and sent his AWS bill into the stratosphere

Who, Me? Yes, he knows the 40x increase could have been avoided with some pretty simple automation
Columnists17 Nov 2025 |72

Actor couldn’t understand why computer didn’t work when the curtain came down

On Call When tech support collides with Halloween, the results are scary
Columnists31 Oct 2025 |102

New boss took charge of project code and sent two billion unwanted emails

On Call Techie summoned at 02:00 AM to sort things out sent another 2 billion trying to fix it
Columnists24 Oct 2025 |107

Company that made power systems for servers didn’t know why its own machines ran out of juice

Who, Me? Oh … you mean we shouldn’t press that button?
Columnists20 Oct 2025 |104

We're all going to be paying AI's Godzilla-sized power bills

Opinion Even if you never use it, you'll be paying for it thanks to datacenters' never-ending hunger for electricity
Columnists13 Oct 2025 |98

I was a part-time DBA. After this failover foul-up, they hired a full-time DBA

Who, Me? At last, enough hours in the day to RTFM
Columnists01 Sep 2025 |76

How Windows 11 is breaking from its bedrock and moving away

Opinion The once mighty Wintel supercontinent is cracking in more ways than you might think
Columnists29 Aug 2025 |125

Techie fooled a panicked daemon and manipulated time itself to get servers in sync

On Call Network Time Protocol sometimes needs help from a temporal cops
Columnists29 Aug 2025 |134

The air is hissing out of the overinflated AI balloon

Opinion Are tech giants getting nervous? They should be
Columnists25 Aug 2025 |238

CIO made a dangerous mistake and ordered his security team to implement it

Who, Me? Firewall pro enjoyed European travel to fix the fallout
Columnists25 Aug 2025 |75

Basic projector repair job turns into armed encounter at secret bunker

On Call Escort's forgotten cap left techie facing rifles and a debrief
Columnists22 Aug 2025 |187

Popular

Anthropic tries to hide Claude's AI actions. Devs hate it

The software doesn't show what files it's working on

Infosec exec sold eight zero-day exploit kits to Russia, says DoJ

Infosec in Brief PLUS: Fake ransomware group exposed; EC blesses Google's big Wiz deal; Alleged sewage hacker cuffed; And more

You probably can't trust your password manager if it's compromised

Researchers demo weaknesses affecting some of the most popular options

Why AI writing is so generic, boring, and dangerous: Semantic ablation

opinion The subtractive bias we're ignoring

Final step to put new website into production deleted it instead

Who, Me? 02:00 AM is not the time to ignore procedures and rely on a shortcut to do a tricky job

Cisco set to release home-brew hypervisor as a VMware alternative

Only for its own comms apps – whose users can probably do without a full private cloud

Dutch cops arrest man after sending him confidential files by mistake

Bungled link handed over sensitive docs, and when recipient didn't cooperate, police opted for cuffs

GPT-5 bests human judges in legal smack down

ai-pocalypse But that doesn't mean AI is ready to dispense justice

Price of popularity: Linux Mint's success also means maintainer stress

Lots of donations, but lots of pressure to go with it

Google patches Chrome zero-day as in-the-wild exploits surface

High-severity CSS flaw let malicious webpages run code inside the sandbox
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The UK Online Safety Act is about censorship, not safety

opinion US policymakers should take heed, says the Electronic Frontier Foundation
Columnists21 Aug 2025 |139

Tech support team won pay rise for teaching customers how to RTFM

On Call Documentation was so substantial, staff measured it in feet
Columnists08 Aug 2025 |146

I just deleted my entire social media presence before visiting the US – and I'm a citizen

Column In 2025, social media has moved from self-expression to self-entrapment
Columnists21 Jul 2025 |232

Under-qualified sysadmin crashed Amazon.com for 3 hours with a typo

Who, Me? 'This, many considered, was bad'
Columnists21 Jul 2025 |80

‘I nearly died after flying thousands of miles to install a power cord for the NSA’

On Call This job was a car wreck in more than one way
Columnists18 Jul 2025 |108

Junior developer's code worked in tests, destroyed data in production

Who, Me? For the lack of a little documentation, two techies did a lot of accidental damage
Columnists14 Jul 2025 |73

Techie traveled 4 hours to fix software that worked perfectly until a new hire used it

On Call Sometimes the 'R' in RTFM stands for 'Remember'
Columnists20 Jun 2025 |182

Culture comes first in cybersecurity. That puts cybersecurity on the front line in the culture wars

Opinion 'Trust us, we're from Trumpland' may not help Microsoft as much as it hopes
Columnists06 May 2025 |44

Teens maintained a mainframe and it went about as well as you'd imagine

Who, Me? Fake it till you make it doesn't cut it for mission-critical workloads
Columnists05 May 2025 |96

Users hated a new app – maybe so much they filed a fake support call

On Call Sysadmin sent on road trip that required a lot of time doing nothing
Columnists11 Apr 2025 |98

Please sir, may we have some Moore? Doesn't look that way

Opinion We're on a roadmap to nowhere. Come on inside
Columnists07 Apr 2025 |31

Dev loudly complained about older colleague, who retired not long after

Who, Me? The graybeard wasn't doing a great job and morale improved once he left. How would you handle this?
Columnists07 Apr 2025 |133

Microsoft's Euro-mandated File Explorer surgery shows 'less is more' is still a thing

Opinion Humble but with a huge history, the utility's privacy pare-back points to a productive possible future
Columnists24 Feb 2025 |21

Untrained techie botched a big hardware sale by breaking client's ERP

Who, Me? 'If I wasn't already taking blood pressure meds, I'm sure I would not have survived'
Columnists24 Feb 2025 |51

Developers feared large chaps carrying baseball bats could come to kneecap their ... test account?

Who, Me? A whole different kind of 'technical debt' turned into real-world trouble
Columnists20 Jan 2025 |91

Why Google's Chrome monopoly won't crack anytime soon

Opinion Haven't we heard this story before?
Columnists23 Nov 2024 |73

Huawei's farewell to Android isn't a marketing move, it's chess

Opinion HarmonyOS NEXT sounds dissonant until you get the theme
Columnists28 Oct 2024 |126

The open secret of open washing – why companies pretend to be open source

Opinion Allowing pretenders to co-opt the term is bad for everyone
Columnists25 Oct 2024 |45

Developer tried to dress for success, but ended up attired for an expensive outage

Who, Me? Debugging software on the waterfront is a strangely dangerous task
Columnists19 Aug 2024 |160

Intel's processor failures: A cautionary tale of business vs engineering

Opinion Chipzilla taking some punches but could it stay down?
Columnists09 Aug 2024 |94

The cybersecurity QA trifecta of fail that may burn down the world

Opinion Malware is often described as biology. It should be the other way around
Columnists05 Aug 2024 |32

Techie's enthusiasm for decluttering fails to spark joy

Who, me? Thankfully, luck – and a handy greybeard – came to the rescue
Columnists06 May 2024 |57

Time to study the classics: Vintage tech is the future of enterprise IT

Opinion Look back in wonder
Columnists16 Jan 2023 |93

Killing trees with lasers isn’t cool, says Epson. So why are inkjets any better?

Imagine there's no printer drivers. It's easy if you can...
Columnists05 Dec 2022 |121

Firefox points the way to eradicating one of the rudest words online: PDF

Comment The ghosts of dead trees haunt us still
Columnists24 Oct 2022 |240

Rust is eating into our systems, and it's a good thing

Opinion Language wars, huh, what are they good for?
Columnists26 Sep 2022 |118

The International Space Station will deorbit in glory. How's your legacy tech doing?

Opinion Your past projects may be a pain, but can they rain fiery death from above?
Columnists30 Aug 2022 |101

You can never have too many backups. Also, you can never have too many backups

Who, Me? A Reg reader comes to appreciate the value of paper
Columnists29 Aug 2022 |116

Big Tech is building the metaverse of its own dreams. You don't want to go there

Opinion No country for old menus
Columnists22 Aug 2022 |105

We were promised integrated packages. Instead we got disintegrated apps

Something for the Weekend Not to mention the severely disadvantageous subscription model
Columnists19 Aug 2022 |145

Psst … Want to buy a used IBM Selectric? No questions asked

On Call We would have got away with it too, if hadn't been for your perfectly reasonable user request
Columnists29 Jul 2022 |174

Dell and Ubuntu certify latest model of XPS 13 ultrabook

Computer giant's Project Sputnik extends to the 2022 model series
Columnists21 Jul 2022 |19

Getting that syncing feeling after an Exchange restore

Who, Me? We've got the whole weekend. What could go wrong?
Columnists04 Jul 2022 |83

Seriously, you do not want to make that cable your earth

On Call Network? What's that when it's at home?
Columnists20 May 2022 |253

RISC-V needs more than an open architecture to compete

Opinion Arm shows us that even total domination doesn't always make stupid levels of money
Columnists16 May 2022 |55

September 16, 1992, was not a good day to be overly enthusiastic about your job

Who, Me? If I get in early and work hard, everyone will notice, right?
Columnists16 May 2022 |64

Confirmation dialog Groundhog Day: I click OK and it keeps coming back

Something for the Weekend Yes/No/Cancel culture at its worst
Columnists13 May 2022 |145

Your AI can't tell you it's lying if it thinks it's telling the truth. That's a problem

Opinion Who knows what evil lurks in the heart of ML? Er, nobody
Columnists25 Apr 2022 |52

In IT, no good deed ever goes unpunished

Who, Me? When being helpful can mean being shown the door
Columnists25 Apr 2022 |71

The month I worked for DEADHEAD: Yes, that was their job title

Something for the Weekend? We can't have that contractor making us look bad
Columnists01 Apr 2022 |71

Beware the techie who takes things literally

Who, Me? 'If it works already, why pay' says the boss... because of course he does
Columnists21 Feb 2022 |94

Food for thought on the return to the office

Something for the Weekend? Quality time with human beings? Nah. Gimme some free Monster Munch
Columnists18 Feb 2022 |87

File suffixes: Who needs them? Well, this guy did

On Call He followed the instructions... blindly
Columnists18 Feb 2022 |206

Nothing's working, and I've checked everything, so it must be YOUR fault

On Call Yes, but are you sure? Really sure?
Columnists07 Jan 2022 |164

Halo Infinite ups the nostalgia factor for fans of the originals, but it's not without limits

The RPG 343 Industries brings open world to the long-running military sci-fi epic
Columnists05 Jan 2022 |11

The year ahead in technology fail: You knew they were bad, now they're going to prove it

Opinion Stock up on schadenfreude, it may be 2022's most popular commodity
Columnists04 Jan 2022 |79

Predictive Dirty Dozen: What will and won't happen in 2022 (unless it doesn’t/does)

Something for the Weekend, Sir? We confidently predict that the predictions in this article will turn out wrong
Columnists31 Dec 2021 |211

Microsoft Paint + car park touchscreen = You already know where this is going

12BoC I'll just pay the- OH MY GOD
Columnists26 Dec 2021 |56

Not the kind of note you want to see fluttering from an ATM

12BoC This won't buy me beer
Columnists25 Dec 2021 |34

Who you gonna call? Premium numbers, but a not-so-premium service

On Call Let me take you back – way back – to 1998
Columnists24 Dec 2021 |134

Log4j and Omicron: Brothers in harm, mothers of invention

Opinion That which does not kill us can still ruin our Christmas
Columnists20 Dec 2021 |36

A smarter alternative to password recognition could be right in front of us: Unique, invisible, maybe even deadly

Something for the Weekend, Sir? Take your breath awayyyyyyyy
Columnists03 Dec 2021 |81

New World: Grindy? Check. Repetitive? Check. Fun? We hate to say it... but check

The RPG Goddamn it, Jeff Bezos' lot can make a passable MMORPG after all
Columnists30 Oct 2021 |31

Config cockup leavesReg reader reaching for the phone

Who, Me? Yet another thing that was really not better in the old days
Columnists11 Oct 2021 |71

Get real: Say what you like about your app but don't be surprised if I trollsplain

Something for the Weekend, Sir? My next column will be written in spaaaaaace
Columnists08 Oct 2021 |57

How to stop a content filter becoming a career-shortening network component

Who, Me? He's not just a Big Cheese. He's a very naughty boy
Columnists31 Aug 2021 |69

When everyone else is on vacation, it's time to whip out the tiny screwdrivers

Something for the Weekend, Sir? Fixing laptops and solving UX conundra – all in a night’s work
Columnists27 Aug 2021 |151

Fix five days of server failure with this one weird trick

On Call When you have eliminated the impossible...
Columnists27 Aug 2021 |163

Horizon Workrooms promises a virtual future of teal despair

Opinion Only one company can make VR so bad it makes MS Teams look good – Facebook
Columnists23 Aug 2021 |42

Hacking the computer with wirewraps and soldering irons: Just fix the issues as they come up, right?

Who, Me? The neverending battle betweeen youthful optimism and aged cyncism
Columnists23 Aug 2021 |103

So the data centre's 'getting a little hot' – at 57°C, that's quite the understatement

On Call You know that thing that's supposed to put out the fire?
Columnists20 Aug 2021 |102

Come fly with me. But first we need to find a boot device

Bork!Bork!Bork! An unexpected bork in the boarding area
Columnists11 Aug 2021 |18

The web was done right the first time. An ancient 3D banana shows Microsoft does a lot right, too

Column It's wonderful that code written for Windows 3.1 still works well today
Columnists11 Aug 2021 |136

How to keep your enterprise up to date by deploying the very latest malware

Who, Me? Salesmen suffer after suspicious surfing
Columnists19 Jul 2021 |71

The world is chaos but my Zoom background is control-freak perfection

Something for the Weekend, Sir? Nudge that potted plant a little to the left aaaaand… action!
Columnists09 Jul 2021 |96

If HAL did digital signage. I know I've made some very poor decisions recently, but I can give you my complete assurance that...

Bork!Bork!Bork! My God! It's full of Bork!
Columnists14 Jun 2021 |17

Thanks, boss. The accidental creation of a lights-out data centre – what a fun surprise

Who, Me? At least nobody said 'watch this!'
Columnists07 Jun 2021 |116

How many remote controls do you really need? Answer: about a bowl-ful

Something for the Weekend, Sir? I don’t care if the football’s on, we’ll have to watch whatever the TV wants us to
Columnists04 Jun 2021 |148

Today I shall explain how dual monitors work using the medium of interpretive dance

On Call You want the truth? You can't handle the truth!
Columnists04 Jun 2021 |150

Nobody expects the borkish bank-wisition: When I said I wanted some notes from the ATM, I never thought I'd see...

Bork!Bork!Bork! ...the vast emptiness of Notepad
Columnists28 May 2021 |16

Nature is healing: Shhh. It's a lesser spotted Pi Bork nesting behind the bushes at IKEA

Bork!Bork!Bork! Hålp, I äm stuck in emergency möde
Columnists25 May 2021 |25

Your private data has been nabbed: Please update your life as soon as possible while we deflect responsibility

Something for the Weekend, Sir? Because our golf-obsessed boss has wandered off fondling his balls
Columnists14 May 2021 |86

Beijing steps on Alibaba's Ant Group by forcing it to submit to same regulation as banks

Requires Alipay to open to competition but stops short of ordering company break up
Columnists13 Apr 2021 |9

How to ensure your tech predictions catch on in a flash? Do the mash

Something for the Weekend, Sir? All inventions should be demonstrated by a puppet doing a Tommy Cooper impression
Columnists09 Apr 2021 |70

A floppy filled with software worth thousands of francs: Techie can't take it, customs won't keep it. What to do?

Who, Me? Halt and catch fire
Columnists05 Apr 2021 |177

Easily distracted by too many apps, too many meetings, and too much asparagus

Something for the Weekend, Sir? Nothing like a steaming bowl of freshly picked spaghetti
Columnists02 Apr 2021 |75

Yep, you're totally unique: That one very special user and their very special problem

On CallRegister reader finds that some Apple fans are... not very bright?
Columnists02 Apr 2021 |195

A Code War has replaced The Cold War. And right now we’re losing it

Column There’s always someone to blame for bad infosec, but never a willingness to make meaningful change
Columnists10 Mar 2021 |85

Stob's vital message to Britain's IT nation: And no, it's not about that

Stob It's actually another Huawei down the 5G antennas
Devops01 Apr 2020 |28

Verity Stob is 'Disgusted of HG Wells': Time, gentlemen, please

Stob Drinking the Kool-Aid outside the box
Columnists28 Jan 2020 |58
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