Story by Cindy Kiro

Main image: The Waru whānau, 2007

Māori parents in tradition

• In tradition, the first parents were the gods Ranginui (sky father) and Papatūānuku (earth mother). They held their children in an embrace in the dark, until the children pushed them apart.
• Tāne, a son of Ranginui and Papatūānuku, created the first woman, Hineahuone, from clay, and fathered Hinetītama with her.
• The demigod Māui was raised by his grandfather. Later he met his mother and eventually his father.

Early Māori parenting

Early European visitors noted that Māori parents were very kind to their children, and seldom hit them. Children were indulged and led a carefree, playful life.

Whānau

Traditionally awhānau was 20–30 people. They had their own compound to live in, and often their own gardens and places to hunt and fish. They were self-sufficient in most ways. Children were seen as the children of the wholewhānau, not just of their mother and father.

Over time thewhānau has changed. Households are smaller, andwhānau may be geographically scattered. People also work longer hours. Parents have less access to support and advice from grandparents, aunts and uncles, and otherwhānau members.

Whāngai

Whāngai (adopting or fostering children) is an important concept forwhānau. People often raise nieces, nephews, cousins and other family members as their own children.

Influences on parenting

Māori women typically have children at a younger age thanPākehā, so they are less likely to have higher educational qualifications, a secure income and a stable relationship. However, younger mothers have fewer complications during pregnancy and birth. In 2013 around one-third of all Māori households were single-parent households. Māori also earned less than the average income.

Abuse and discipline

Traditionally, Māori rarely hit their children. Today, while mostwhānau do a good job of raising their children, some families have life experiences that increase the danger to children within them. In some cases, poverty, lack of education, mental illness and family violence may be associated with child abuse and neglect.

Raising healthy children

Children benefit from being part of a widerwhānau, and having close relationships with their grandparents and otherwhānau members. Today some people are reviving traditional parenting practices such as oriori (lullabies), mirimiri (massage) and rituals.