Keywords: Kink, Kinky women, Female sexuality, Unconventional sexual behaviors, BDSM, Alternative sexuality

Definitions

For the purpose of this study, akink behavior refers to unconventional sensual, erotic, and sexual behavior including BDSM-related behaviors (physical and psychological stimuli including bondage, discipline, dominance, submission, sadism and masochism), exhibitionistic behaviors (arousal by being observed by others), voyeuristic behaviors (arousal by observing others), fetishistic behaviors (arousal by objects), and others. Many of these behaviors may be described in clinical research as paraphilias (Fedoroff, Fishell, & Fedoroff,1999). However, some of these terms used by researchers and by the participants associated with those labels do not necessarily describe the behaviors or attitudes of the participants. Although clinical terms such assadism,masochism, andsadomasochism have been appropriated by certain groups, members of these groups may use the terms non-clinically. There is no authoritative definition of the non-clinical use of these terms nor is there a consensus regarding the behaviors these labels encompass.

In this paper, the termkink practitioner refers to a person who participates in at least one of the kink behaviors described, and the termkink community refers to organizations representing kink practitioners. These organizations provide physical or online spaces for adults with similar interests to meet, discuss, support, educate, and/or interact and may also be known as BDSM, Fetish, Leather, Sadomasochistic, S&M, SM, S/M, Alt Sex, and Alternative Sexuality, among others. There may be nuances and differences between these various organizations; however, these differences are outside the scope of this research.

Participants

The present study investigated the sensual, erotic, and sexual behaviors of women from the kink community in order to both expand on previous quantitative research found in the literature and address the dearth of data regarding women from this population. A total of 1764 participants began the survey between June 2010 and May 2011. However, only participants who answered at least one question about their sensual, erotic, or sexual behaviors were analyzed. Therefore, 1580 participants (N = 1580) were included in the present analysis. All participants indicated that they were female and over the age of 18. The median age was 34 years, and the mean age was 35.53 with a SD of 10.74. The age range was between 19 and 72 years.

This was an international sample, with nearly 80 % of the participants from the U.S. (women from 49 states responded, with the highest percentage from California), and about 20 % from the following 20 countries: Australia, Austria, Belgium, Brazil, Canada, Czech Republic, Ecuador, England, Finland, France, Germany, India, Ireland, Japan, Mexico, Netherlands, New Zealand, Scotland, Switzerland, and Wales.

About half of the women in the sample (55.31 %) described their relationship status as partnered: either married, in a domestic partnership, or in a long-term relationship. Approximately 42 % were single, divorced/separated, or widowed. A majority of participants (74.33 %) indicated a relationship status not typically asked in demographic surveys. Table 1 provides detailed information on the relationship status of the participants.

Measure

For the purpose of this study, questions about these activities were categorized as follows: 62 BDSM-related behaviors, 10 role-play scenarios, 5 forms of exhibitionistic behaviors, 8 forms of erotica, 5 broad categories of fetishistic behaviors, 24 overt sexual activities, and 12 miscellaneous erotic activities. These categories are not rigid and should not be considered as such. Participants provided 72 additional “other” activities through fill-in answers. For each question, the “other” responses were counted only if the information was not simply a clarification of answers.

The survey instrument1 was designed to provide data comparable to previous quantitative studies that investigated behaviors of kink practitioners while concurrently investigating a broader spectrum of human sexual behaviors. Participants were asked to indicate which of 126 activities they willingly participated in for their own sensual or erotic pleasure. The survey provided opportunities to add additional comments, including six questions prompting clarification or expansion of answers (fill-in text) and 15 “other” text boxes. Due to practical limitations, only the questions from the survey about demographic information and quantitative information pertaining to behaviors are reported in this article.

Procedure

The Internal Review Board of San Francisco State University approved this project. Participants were recruited through a variety of kink community events, including social functions, educational workshops, play parties, weekend retreats, and via online forums. Administrators of each group listed onwww.thebdsmeventspage.com (that were not specifically male-oriented and that had active websites) were contacted via e-mail and were informed about the nature of the study along with a request to recruit participants. Upon permission from the organizers, recruiting flyers and recruiting scripts were distributed at the event and/or posted online. These materials included the URL link for the online survey.

The first recruitment effort was in June 2010 at a women-only kink community event. The remaining active recruitment efforts took place from August through December 2010. Approval was received from a total of 21 kink organizations during the active recruitment period. Between January and May 2011 (after the recruitment efforts ended and no additional flyers or invitations were distributed), an additional 219 surveys were completed online. Due to the nature of online social networking, some snowball sampling may have occurred (through word-of-mouth, e-mail, and online posts).

Data Analysis

Answers from the survey were analyzed quantitatively using single variable descriptive statistics and frequency analysis. The following data were collected and analyzed: the activity participated in, the type of participation (doing to, having done to, observing), the total number of activities per person, and the average and range of number of activities participated in.

BDSM-Related Behaviors: Physical and Psychological Stimuli

Table 2 shows the percentage of the women who indicated that they participated in the 62 BDSM-related behaviors provided in the survey. The column “Doing to and/or Done to you” indicates the percentage of the women who participated in the activity in either role whereas the column “Participated (in any form)” also includes responses from “Observing Activity.”

The majority of participants enjoyed many kinds of tactile sensations, such as touching (caress, cuddle, massage, tickle), kissing/licking/sucking, grooming, applying (body paint, chocolate, oil, food, etc.), ice play, candle wax play, and using feathers/fur. The two activities that had the highest response rate for erotic and sensual pleasure from the entire survey were touching and kissing. As evidenced by these results, the category of “sensation play without the necessity of pain” is a common phenomenon found among these participants.

It has been noted in previous community-based research that behaviors that may cause pain but are relatively safe tended to be more common than more extreme or dangerous behaviors (described by Moser and Levitt as “more likely to cause medical problems”) (Breslow et al.,1985; Moser & Levitt,1987). This was consistent with the present findings. Some of the most common among these activities included spanking, hair pulling, biting, and scratching/leaving marks/abrasion. More than half (and in some cases nearly all) of the participants reported that they participated in the following activities, which could be described as “sadomasochism”: breast play (slap, clothespins, etc.), paddling, hickeys, flogging, genital play (slap, kick, clothespins, etc.), pinching, using clothespins/clamps, whipping, and caning.

Some of the more extreme activities (i.e., those with a greater potential to elicit pain or cause physical or psychological damage), while participated in by fewer people, tended to have a higher proportion of women observing these activities for sensual or erotic pleasure. It is possible that more dangerous activities have higher erotic value for the sake of fantasy as opposed to physically experiencing them (i.e., perhaps people do not want to risk harm to themselves or their partners, but are still aroused by fantasized danger). Another possible explanation is that these activities are performed by fewer people because they take a certain amount of training, skill, experience or equipment rather than because of a lack of interest.

The present survey explored psychological components of BDSM behaviors and included 12 activities that could fit this description. The majority of the women from this sample indicated that they participated in at least one of the following activities for their own sensual or erotic pleasure: physical humiliation, deprivation, punishment (physical), breath play, obedience/training, verbal abuse/humiliation, other forced activities, and service-oriented submission/domestic service.

The psychological component of kink is also demonstrated in part by the significant number of women from this sample (n = 1384; 87.59 %) who participated in at least one of the 10 role-play scenarios presented (in any form). As shown in Table 3, the three most popular role-play scenarios were Master/slave fantasy,2 danger fantasy, and jobs/occupation play. The columns with “in either role” indicate the percentage of women from this subsample who participated in the role play scenario regardless of which role they took whereas the columns with “Participated (in any form)” combined answers from any of their roles and from observing.

The present results support the idea that bondage is one of the more preferred activities. In fact, more than 85 % of the participants indicated that they have used bondage toys for sensual or erotic pleasure. There was almost no difference between the number of participants of light bondage and moderate bondage (each at over 80 %), which were defined in this survey as “Able to get out if you wanted to” and “Can’t get out on own, but with body mobility,” respectively. More than half of the participants engaged in stringent/extreme bondage (immobilized).

Exhibitionistic and Voyeuristic Behaviors

More than half of the survey sample (n = 887; 56.14 %) indicated that they participated in at least one of the five categories of exhibitionistic behavior (erotic pleasure from being observed) listed in the survey. As shown in Table 4, the majority of this subsample enjoyed showing bare breasts, followed by engaging in public sex, being naked, acting out sexual fantasy/role play, and showing genitals. More than one half of the participants indicated that they posed for erotic images and/or that they shared erotic images of themselves with others for their own sensual or erotic pleasure (see Table 5 for details). As shown in Table 6, most of the participants (82.78 %) indicated that they created or observed at least one of the following forms of erotica for their own sensual or erotic pleasure: erotic literature, sexual pornography, and observing performances and nude paintings, among others.

Many women who responded to this survey reported voyeuristic tendencies from observing others (in a non-clinical sense). When asked if they received sensual or erotic pleasure by observing any of the 96 activities, 1366 (86.46 %) of the 1580 surveyed responded affirmatively, with each of the 96 activities being observed at least once. Receiving pleasure by observing may be a more common phenomenon among women than previously considered.

Fetishistic Behaviors

A total of 1192 (75.44 %) women indicated that they have been sexually aroused by an object in at least one of the five categories of objects presented in the survey. Clothing, specific body part(s), and fabrics were the most popular categories of this subsample, as shown in Table 7. This study does not address the degree of preference or fixation a participant may have with a particular fetish or fetishes, but rather, takes a non-clinical approach to arousal by objects not specifically designed for sexual response.

Overt Sexual Behaviors

Researchers have examined additional erotic activities that are not necessarily defined as BDSM behaviors. Specifically, oral sex, anal sex, rimming, and masturbation have been mentioned in previous studies, and, with the exception of rimming, all have been found to be common among male and female participants (female participants were not asked about rimming in these previous studies) (Breslow et al.,1985; Levitt et al.,1994; Moser & Levitt,1987; Sandnabba et al.,1999). Participants in this study were queried regarding 24 overt sexual activities and were offered a choice of up to 5 categories for each sexual activity. These categories included “Doing Activity to Women,” “Doing Activity to Men,” “Having Activity Done by Women,” “Having Activity Done by Men,” and “Observing Activity.” In Table 8, the column “Doing, having done, and/or both” indicates the percentage of women from this subsample who participated in the activity in any role whereas the column “Participated (in any form)” also includes responses from “Observe Activity.”

Based on the 1394 participants who responded to the question about overt sexual activities, the present results found that oral sex (cunnilingus and fellatio) and anal sex were among the more common of these activities. In fact, as shown in Table 8, each of the following overt sexual activities was more common than coital sex (penetrating vagina with penis) from this subsample: oral sex, including cunnilingus and fellatio, hand job (stimulating genitals with hands/fingers), and anal sex (stimulating anus with fingers or penis).

Other popular overt sexual activities (between 40 and 88 %) included stimulating vagina with other sex toys, genital-to-genital contact: non-penetrative, ingesting semen, stimulating anus with sex toys, mammary intercourse (rubbing phallic object or penis between breasts), worship (kissing, licking, smelling, enjoying a specific body part), rimming (stimulating anus with mouth), ingesting vaginal fluid, stimulating penis with sex toys (cock rings, sheath, etc.), sucking/licking dildo with mouth, using a strap-on dildo to penetrate vagina, vaginal fisting, using a strap-on dildo to penetrate anus, and foot job (stimulating genitals with feet).

Miscellaneous Erotic Behaviors

Almost all of the 1376 participants who answered the question about additional erotic activities (see Table 9 for details) indicated that they masturbated (solo). Solo masturbation rates were higher in this study (at 86.01 % of the entire sample) as compared to female participants from previous studies, including the Kinsey et al. (1953) study at 62 %, 73 % from the Breslow et al. (1985) study, and 59 % from the Levitt et al. (1994) study. It is difficult to ascertain why this disparity exists. Possibilities include the notion that these women were more likely to be comfortable enough with their sexuality to engage in this behavior, that the taboo of masturbation is less prevalent now than in the past, that these women were more comfortable admitting to this behavior, or that masturbation is more prevalent for women from this particular population. Mutual masturbation (with a partner) and phone sex were also popular activities, followed by sex with inanimate objects, cyber sex (webcam), group sex, anonymous sex/sex with strangers, and swinging.

Female-Specific Erotic Behaviors

The survey included activities that are likely to be unique to females (and therefore had not been addressed in previous quantitative studies about kink behaviors). These activities included hair pulling, breast play, corset training, breast torture, imposed masculinization, showing bare breasts, ingesting vaginal fluid, passing female vaginal fluid from mouth-to-mouth, using a strap-on dildo to penetrate vagina, stimulating vagina with other sex toys, vaginal fisting, mammary intercourse, using a strap-on dildo to penetrate anus, and non-penetrative genital to genital contact. Additional categories from the fill-in responses that also may be unique to women included lactation play (such as adult breastfeeding/adult erotic nursing/drinking or squirting of breast milk), stimulating vagina with breast, blood play using menstrual blood, cunnilingus on menstruating woman, stimulation of g-spot, clitoris, or nipples, double/triple/multiple penetration (vaginal, anal, oral), cuckolding, using one partner to have sexual encounters with another person, squirting vaginal fluid, swallowing and playing with own vaginal fluids, and strap-on cock sucking. Very little data about these activities exist in the scientific literature.

Combined Results

Table 10 shows the percentage of the entire sample that participated in an activity (in any form). When considering all forms of sensual, erotic, and sexual behaviors listed in the survey, the 20 most common activities (in any form) were as follows (in order from most common to least common): touching, kissing/licking/sucking, spanking, hair pulling, biting, scratching/leaving marks/abrasion, use bondage toys, moderate bondage, masturbation (solo), cunnilingus, light bondage, paddling, breast play, hand job, flogging, fellatio, grooming, stimulating anus with fingers or penis, genital play, and ice play. This was somewhat similar to previous research. From their female sample, Levitt et al. (1994) reported “clear preferences for bondage, spanking (the traditional bondage and discipline duo), oral sex, and the master–slave game…” (p. 471). However, in this present sample there were several other activities that were equally as common, or more common, including light sensations/tactile play, masturbation, breast play, and anal play.

Limitations

Limitations of this study include the categorization of behaviors, the subjectivity of terms, the inherent limits of online data collection, and sampling methods. Categorization was problematic. Some activities can be grouped into more than one category; for example, “choking on cock” could be categorized as a sadomasochistic act or it could be labeled as fellatio and fall under the category of overt sexual activity. Some participants pointed out that, from their perspective, the behaviors were miscategorized or too general. For example, enema play should have been separated from fecal play, as some participants stated that they engaged in enema play without being in contact with their partner’s feces. Also, the survey asked participants to indicate only the behaviors they participated in willingly for their own sensual or erotic pleasure, yet it is possible that members of the kink community participate in many of the activities listed for nonsexual purposes. For example, some women from this sample mentioned in open-ended questions that they participated in these behaviors for spiritual, medical, or therapeutic purposes. Therefore, it is necessary to reconsider how erotic stimuli and kink behaviors are categorized.

The terms used for the activities are subjective and may have different meanings to different participants. Also, certain terms used in the kink community may have different meanings than they do in the general population. For example, there is a difference between what people from the kink community call “torture” and real torture, and it is understood that “slaves” from the kink community are not being held against their will as contrasted with the sex trade industry or criminal kidnappings. Additionally, the distinction between “doing an activity,” “having an activity done to you,” and “observing an activity” is imprecise and may also be subjectively interpreted by participants. For example, kissing may be seen as doing to, having done to, or both.

A request to participate in this study was distributed by flyers to various events and organizations in the kink community, both at physical locations and online. However, the survey itself was available only online, limiting participation to people with Internet access and sufficient opportunity to complete it. This method also limited the ability of participants to ask for clarification or expansion of ideas or topics. It is possible that behaviors listed in the beginning of the survey had a higher response rate due to survey fatigue or some of the participants dropping out of the study. As with any anonymous survey, one must be cautious since there is no effective method to verify the responses.

This study was based on a community-based, non-random sample. Therefore, results should not be generalized to the general population. Without knowledge of the total number of kink practitioners, the sample size may not be statistically significant for the results to be representative of the entire kink community. It is reasonable to assume that there are many people practicing kink behaviors who have no knowledge of the kink community; it is also reasonable to assume that many people practice kink behaviors but do not label the behaviors as kink or think of themselves as part of the community. It is likely that these people were not included in this study.

Recommendations for Future Research

This present study was exploratory and descriptive, and it revealed many possible avenues for future research. Further analysis of data from this study and collecting additional data are also recommended.

Breslow et al. (1985) noted that the participants tended to have a lower rate of marriage compared to the general population (more were single or divorced). In the present study, 74.33 % indicated a relationship status not typically asked in demographic surveys (i.e., single, divorced, married, or widowed). Further investigations are warranted to better understand the complexity and variety of relationship dynamics.

The survey asked only if the women had participated in an activity willingly and for their own sensual or erotic pleasure; this does not address the degree of preference for any particular activity. The connections between desires, fantasies, participation, observation, opportunity, and sexual orientation and identity should be examined in more detail, perhaps with a longitudinal study in order to capture changes over time. This study did not differentiate between having participated only once, as an occasional activity, as an integral part of sexual patterns, or as a favorite activity. Furthermore, the reasons for participating in kink activities were addressed only on a general level. More nuanced information about the motivations behind specific behaviors would require further investigation.

The activities provided in the survey did not measure levels of intensity of stimulation. For example, spanking could mean a light tap on the buttocks, a slap that leaves a welt, or an accumulation of light taps that together provide a stinging sensation. Different people may perceive pain and intense stimulation in different ways. One of the study participants described having fibromyalgia and allodynia, and she used kink behaviors as a way of dealing with her chronic pain. This phenomenon warrants further investigation.

The issue of safety and consent were mentioned on several occasions in the fill-in responses, including the acronyms SSC (Safe, Sane, and Consensual) and RACK (Risk Aware Consensual Kink). One possible explanation of the survey results showing the more “dangerous” activities to be engaged in by fewer participants may be due to an emphasis on safety in some parts of the community.

Further analysis of the open-ended questions answered in this survey will likely provide a more detailed understanding of preferences, motivations, relationship dynamics, and various aspects of the kink community. Some of these fill-in responses included favorites (such as erotic activities, objects, role-play scenarios, and erotica themes), and descriptions of experiences, meanings, and lifestyles. Additionally, in order to provide even more insight into the phenomenon of kink and of female sexuality, a more in-depth analysis should be made of the role preferences (i.e., “Doing to” and “Done to you”), the relationship between observing and participating in an activity, and the additional categories provided by fill-in responses.

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