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So yeah. History. You might think of "History" as events from the real world past. Or you might think of it as prior drama, as in "I've got a history on this site." Or maybe you'll think of it from a meta perspective, as in the history of the SCP Foundation wiki.

Or maybe I just wanted to write some Sumerian fapbait.

- Clef

EDIT: Some people are asking if SCP-4XXX is intentional.

No, it's not, it's just a placeholder for whatever number it ends up with.

EDIT Again: Removed the Supplemental Information as a separate page and collapsed it into the same page to avoid clutter.

EDIT Yet Again: Added a few "sketches from F. William Abernathy's notebook" to the Abernathy Files. (If any actual artists out there want to take my shitty sketches and make them look more like what an actual 1910s-era archaeologist might have drawn in their notebook, call me.)

Jesus Christ, that addendum.

And that description.

+1

While the containment procedures are interesting, I'm not really seeing anything that justifies their presence. Right now it feels like there's a setup here for something horrible beneath the milk and honey. But there isn't, and we have yet another Foundation origin story, which is growing a bit old at this point \:

It's good writing, that's for sure. Just could use a bit more filling out, is all.

I don't know whether or not I missed the Abernathy Files or if they were added after I read for the first time, but the tone of this piece is completely changed.

The events laid out very much contradict my headcanon, but they are hilarious, and I could totally see that happening. Belated +1.

Part of me wants this to win just because it would set avery interesting tone for the rest of Series 5. That part of me is a horrible little goblin that probably shouldn't be fed, but the impulse stands.

Minor critique: I do think the XXX's make this feel unfinished, like you rushed the draft out without editing it properly. Since you'll have to edit it later anyway no matter how it places, there's no reason not to just label it 4000. Additionally, the final "complaint" addenda feel just a little forced. That said, they remind me of all the little personal anecdotes we used to have back in Series 1, and that makes the aforementioned horrible little goblin in my brain happy in a weird way.

+1 from me just for good lewd Mesopotamian fun.

Upon the suggestion of one of my beta readers, I have rearranged the structure of this article and added a coda to the final section.

And so the world is doomed because people jerk it to R34. I mean, I dunno if it'sdoom, per se, but I love that first paragraph of the description. Once I toughed it out to the end (with, let's be honest, much eye-rolling), I knew I was in for a ride. Building the whole Foundation around her is crazy awesome, and I adore the historical records in the third document.

I'm not sure this is 4000, but I'll definitely upvote it after the contest, because it's a good skip. And I'm glad there's something on the wiki that uses the word 'yonic' now, I have only just learned that word myself and I love it.

I will say, the email conversation with RAISA at the end of the first document is probably unnecessary. It's funny, but I had the backstory figured out by that point, and it was telling me nothing I didn't already know.

And I kinda figured Carter was who I thought it was, and I'm very pleased with myself for discerning "Ld. M." was related. :3

Also also, it's 'ziggurat'. :B

I like this a lot- it's harkening back to the Series I feel in a very tongue-in-cheek way; Containment Procedures that involve them doing something very silly- which is always a plus for me- and it's the first time I've seen a Foundation origin story that makes me want to see it expanded upon in future works.

Title was changed thanks to a suggestion from Reddit.

Not only was this a really funny idea, the execution was amazing. +1 you horny genius