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I'd like to thank Troy for help with coding, and Moose and Troy for once overing for all the shit i usually miss.
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I really like this. Especially some of the test logs, and especially the kicker: once you finish (or fail at) the game, you may still continue to live your life, but it will never be the same again. Navigating ANY building will require help and a lot of trial and error, and you could conceivably end up trapped for a long time depending on how high the chance is that the door will keep opening to the game. And living outside forever… kind shitty, eh? Your life would be forever altered. And maybe, just maybe, eventually you're going to figure 'fuck it, let me bite the bullet and enter the room' and then … who knows what's on the other side? Gah.
+1
EDIT: On reread, I still like some of the same things, but I dislike many of the tropes used, and the writing is often bad. (I also clearly recall part of my enthusiasm being for people-pleasing reasons, though not all.)
On balance, vote removed.
(account deleted)Liked and upvoted, with two issues:
1. The fact that the Foundation a) knows exactly what happens to and b) is capable of supplying and/or coercing the experimental subjects suggests that the Foundation is having agents or operatives following the test subjects everywhere they go, but nowhere in the article does it say that they do that. That would seem to need at least a mention in the containment procedures.
2. I don't care for the ending much. There's no particular reason why the Foundation would react with "Whoop, sorry, you gotta go be molested again!" when they could just, um, not do that. They don't gain anything from it or lose anything by just letting her go into the door or kill herself on her own schedule.
Also, the sentence "Now all you have to find is the way out!" doesn't need a comma.
The three subjects shown are d-class and an agent. It would be assumed we have control over where they go.
And added something I thought was implicit.
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The D-class, maybe. But there's no specific reason why an Agent would normally be followed around by security, carrying radio equipment and survival equipment, and the writing suggests that somebody was physically present in all of these instances to describe what the individuals saw on the other side of the door. A security camera wouldn't be likely to see what was inside of the door, or know that the guy in the first one was "eagerly" rushing through the door, or that it closed by itself. And by itself, I don't imagine D-class are literally individually supervised by personnel standing by with amnesiacs at all times. If these people are being followed specifically because they took part in the experiment, that's a procedure that is special to the SCP in question and assists with containment. There's no reason not to specify it in the section of the article just for those.
I also still don't get why they forced the last one through the door. If she had a tracking device (which should also be mentioned in the procedures) and they just wanted to see if it would fail again, that's a reason, but you should explain what it is. It really is kinda mustache-twirly as is.
…Do you not get that these logs are tests? They are specifically doing these tests to see what happens to the indivduals?
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Then we're into personal territory. In my SCPs, I tend to include protocols for testing, i.e. who, where, and how the thing is to be tested in a general sense. I guess it's your prerogative not to include it, but I think the Foundation would include it in the document somewhere.
I think you go to far in that direction, it starts to make things boring.
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Also, the sentence "Now all you have to find is the way out!" doesn't need a comma.
It 'works' without the coma, but with it there is a dramatic pause in the reading; that pause allows for a 'logic flip' where you think it's talking about finding things in the game, then it becomes much more personal.
In closing, I'll share some Ancient Wisdom; "Time flies like an Arrow; Fruit flies like a Banana."
The final test ending doesn't quite work right for me. It teaches them nothing new, so why force her through? It seems mustache-twirlingly evil.
They know she's innocent at this point, so they can't just say to themselves "Well, she's a D-class, she deserves it".
That one is a prime point at which to have them test out whether someone can avoid ever going into the maze: how long the effect lasts; it could be that it only lasts a week, or a month.
I mean, she's going to go through eventually, but they don't know that yet, it needs to be tested.
This. I still upvoted, but this sticks out as not quite making sense.
If they even just threw some communication equipment they hadn't tried yet on her before shoving her through the door it would be fixed.
Last bit ruined it for me too. I really dislike it when someone does something that paints the organization as a cartoony "do it just because" type of evil or malicious.
It was never meant to be 'evil,' but another attempt to trace the user.
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The new version is a bit more realistic but there might be an inconstancy. In the main writing and in the previous test with the agent contact was lost when he went through the doorway. In the 3rd test contact wasn't lost until the door closed. Oversight or is the experimental equipment working better?
And if the equipment stops working as soon as it goes through the door way couldn't they have put it in first to see if it even worked before tossing her in?
While I get that they're not going to give up a chance to experiment; there's an experiment that's clearly needed, but isn't being done: If you avoid doors for a month, do they still keep opening into the maze?
So why not do it with the person who you know doesn't deserve to go through the door?
It's not like they can't do the tracing with another D-class easily enough.
It just seems implausible to me that an organisation like the foundation wouldn't consider conserving their employees state of mind important; and actively throwing an innocent woman into a situation where she's going to be sexually assaulted is not going to be good for the researchers, and guards, sanity.
She would still end up through there, with tracking device, when it finally turned out that even a month later the doors still opened into the labyrinth. But it wouldn't do as much damage to employee retention.
Aside from this one bit, I really like the article, but it just grates me.
… because she was told she had to find the one person who could prove her innocence. This choice of words implies, very strongly, that such a person exists (even if she was unable to find that person), and that therefore she did not actually commit the crime in question.
It's not "find the person who can give you an alibi", it's not "find the lawyer who can keep you from being convicted", it's not "find the story that will convince the judge". It's "find the person who can prove your innocence".
This is why everyone is upset about mistreating the D-class. Because you've phrased this in such a way that it's obvious she's innocent, and most readers are used to thinking about D-class as criminal scum who deserve whatever happens to them.
Or, maybe it was meant to give her hope, when she reallywasn't innocent. Since she couldn't find a person who could prove her innocent, there wasn't one, which means she was guilty as charged.
but if she wasn't innocent, and she'd know that no such person existed, then why would she have hope?
There's a story….
Closing arguments at a murder trial. The defense attorney is a master orator, and is hammering on the fact that the victim's body was never found. "And perhaps", he says in that wonderful voice of his, "perhaps the alleged 'victim' has been found alive an hour ago, and is about to walk through that courtroom door!"
and so persuasive and evocative is he, that all the jurors turn around and look at the door.
No one walks through the door.
"You see," the defense attorney says, "you all have a reasonable doubt as to whether my client killed anyone."
Then it's the prosecutor's turn.
"You all turned to look at the door", he says, "because you all thought it might be possible that the victim might walk through it. But the defendant did not, because heknows that the victim is dead."
I read it as the game fucking with her, and giving her an unsolvable game, because there was no such person.
But there are no other unsolvable puzzles listed: There's no mention of them ever being impossible. Why would the game suddenly break it's MO on this one case?
I read it as the game fucking with her because the person in question wasdead.
but even if that personis dead, that means that therewas (at one point) someone who could prove her innocent.
Massively late reply, but in Dr Davidson's theory the game would be fucking with her because the person could have proved her innocence, but he can't because SHE killed him, and as such he is not innocent.
I agree with everything in this comment, except the notion that, if shehad actually murdered those children, that would somehow make her "deserving" of getting sexually abused. But that's a whole 'nother can of worms.
Piffy is anSCP Foundation Moderator, Lv. 9001 Squishy Wizard, and Knight of the Red Pen.
I don't exactly believe it myself: But then, I wouldn't work in the Foundation, wouldn't be able to cope with what's done to the D-class.
SCP-1590 is a one kilobyte program, or 'application,' designed for use…
The scare quotes are out of place - "application" is not a slang/informal term. The sentence would read better without that part, anyway: calling it a program is completely adequate.
A dark child's bedroom
A darkened child's bedroom? A child's darkened bedroom?Why's it gotta be the dark kid?
- What happens if one person starts the game and then gives it to someone who's already played?
- Why do we force subjects into the rooms after they're done?
- How much gear can we equip the player with when they enter the room?
1Nothing, i presume.
2. To try and figure out where they are going.
3. as much as they can carry, presumably.
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