Well, this was a hell (hehe) of a ride.

I'd like to begin by saying a massive thank you to my co-author,Trotskyeet, who made this so much better than I possibly could've done myself.

Secondly, I'd like to thank all people who critted this before we posted and helped us figure out some (not all!) of the puns present within this article:Placeholder McD |GremlinGroup |Dysadron |Kish99 |Cole 13 |S D Locke |Reyas |R4_EX |Rose the Changeling |Lamentte |Dr Leonerd. Additional massive thanks toWoedenaz for coming up with Surratt's full name and toTyumen for giving Björn Björnsson his!

Yes, it is inspired by a meme —cybersqyd however confirmed in #site17 it is okay to use it as inspiration if we went actually in-depth into the consequences of being drafted to a skeleton war and told an original story, which we did. The title is a direct reference toFortunate Son by Creedence Clearwater Revival.

IMPORTANT: This article uses edited quotes fromSoldier's Creed. We do not claim this text as our own, it is merely meant to be a parody-reference of the original.Elenee FishTruck andHexick confirmed it is okay to use it and attribute it the way we did just now. The definition of the Terminal object class is an edited version of the one present inNagiros'sComprehensive List of Esoteric Classes. All other citation and attribution is provided in the info Ayers Infomodule.

In the third paragraph, first log, it says a sound “coming from within around them” its a quick fix :)

Also I would consider changing calling the red creatures with horns from being called demons to being called SCP-5572-1, it makes more sense for the researchers transcribing the log to call them that.

Alrighty, when reading the description/conprocs, I wasn't really that invested, but when the logs started is a completely different story. I really enjoyed the weird, surreal worldbuilding, and the ending was the icing on the cake for me.

100% one of the most entertaining articles I've read in a long time!

This is so crazy and stupid and I love it so much +1

I knew this would be a good article, i could feel it in my bones +1

Haha, it was so good to read. The bone joke are fucking amazing.
+1

Fox 🦊

I am very glad its out!

I liked the world you were trying to set up, but it almost feels like the story is biting off more than it can chew. Developing 4 characters and the world in the SCP format isn't easy, and I feel like none of them get the time/development they deserve as a result. The best example of this is the idea that all of the items in hell get there by either being buried with whoever died (e.g. Surratt's suit) or occasionally fall through from the overworld into the underworld (e.g. Beethoven's pipe). This is a really interesting concept, but the ways that this would alter how the skeletons live(?) and fight is never explored. Do they turn dead skeletons into weapons/tools to save on materials? Do they treasure the rare book or board game that falls through? Have some of the skeletons been trying to teach themselves how to use modern technology? Exploring this idea could add a lot of depth to the world and characters, but it ends up being a dropped point in favor of moving the story along.

Forum signatures were a mistake.

Novote.

The story is decently engaging in parts, but it struggles with the sheer amount of things it has to juggle.
The part that shines (the camaraderie between Bjorn, Beethoven and Surratt) ends up falling out of focus in favor of a conclusion that's, not out of left field per se, ultimately barely connected to the thematic undertaking of the article.

I am devastated by all of these puns. Also, how can a skeleton be obese?