We're doomed!

Adoomsday scenario is a story of how we might meet our horrible end as aspecies, or even how theEarth might be destroyed. These range from themythical, to the silly, to theparanoid, to thescientific.

Mythical[edit]

• Armageddon, as described in theBook of Revelation in theBible.
• 2012 apocalypse
• Earth changes.
• Ragnarok, theNorse mythology ending where (spoiler) Odin dies.

Silly[edit]

• Thealien overlords finally tire of anally probing us and vape theplanet.
• Intentionalhumanextinction. (see:Voluntary Human Extinction Movement)
• TheGays create an evil gay-turning robot that turns everyone GAY!
• The colors of therainbow grow so pretty in the sky they grain into the faces of all the people going by.
• Someone will divide by zero. Luckilymost calculators have safeguards against this and will display an error if you try it.
• The Vogons actuallydo destroy earth for a Galactic freeway.^[1]
• A planet-eatingdoomsday machine devours the Earth.
• Priests in some lost Himalayan country complete writing down the 10,000 names ofGod.^[2]
• AnImperial fleet that was just about to begin an Exterminatus in anGodEmperorforsaken planet is warped in both space and time and does it by mistake on present Earth.

Paranoid[edit]

• TheNew World Order takes over, and finally tires of anally probing us and vapes the planet.
• A "Camp of the Saints" scenario, from the novel "Camp of the Saints" by Jean Raspail, in which civilization collapses due to hordes ofillegal immigrants.

Scientific[edit]

• Total existence failure, everyatom in existence deletes itself (scientific progress goes "boink").
• Newly discovered more stable form of ice converts all liquid water into ice.^[3]
• Numerous "how theuniverse may end" scenarios speculated on inpopular science andscience woo circles.

Astronomical[edit]

• A large asteroid surprises us and impacts the Earth, totally screwing up Archer Daniels Midland's monopoly ongenetically modified soybeans.
• Ablack hole drops in on theSolar System (immensely unlikely).
• TheSun becomes ared giant (no need to hurry).
• Quantum fluctuations ingravity suck the Earth into the Sun (extremely unlikely).^{[citation needed]}
• Gamma ray bursts (absurdly unlikely).^[4]
• Collision of the Milky Way with another galaxy. Our next impact is scheduled in about 4,000,000,000 years^[5] (certain to occur, though the solar system itself will probably be unaffected).

Biological[edit]

• A newvirus/bacteria/parasiteevolves and eliminatesmankind (not exactly doomsday becauselife will go on. Also has to get around the fact that there exists an inverse relationship between ease of transfer anddeath rates percentage.)
  • Zombie Holocaust! (less likely).
• Massinsanity: every person in the world goes insane (halfway there).
• Someone genetically engineers a virus that kills us all, either deliberately or carelessly.^[6]
• Ecosystem collapse,acid rain or some other environmental disaster destroys the biosphere.
• Overpopulation: the sheer demand for resources launches a mass globalwar.
• Evolution takes over, and humans become a new species. The human race would be "extinct", but our descendants would still be here.

Planetary[edit]

• Peak oil.
• All life is reduced togrey goo due tonanotechnology.
• Global thermonuclear war (frighteningly plausible, though less likely to happen on a global scale since the end of the Cold War).
• Runawayglobal warming on aVenus-like scale (unlikely; it was repudiated by the same scientist who popularized it.^[7])
• TheOzone layer peaces out, turning the Sun into a deadly ultraviolet lazer. (Narrowly averted, but there's a possibility that global warming will cause this anyway.^[8])
• Yellowstone National Park blows its top (the entire park lies on a supervolcano that has gone off several times in the past, but is very unlikely to erupt again in the near future) [insert fart joke here]
• Magnetic field reversal (there is nothing in thefossil record to indicate that any previous reversals have caused any problems).
• Tectonics: the entire Pacific Ocean slides underAsia, sucking theCalifornia coast along with it. TheHawaiian hotspot burns through and creates a massive volcano inSiberia.Europe crashes into the east coast ofNorth America. The Himalayas fall over due to being too tall, wrecking most ofIndia.Antarctica breaks into five sections, and each section proceeds north to destroy another continent. See alsoExpanding EarthHypothesis.

See also[edit]

• Existential risk
• List of predictions of the end of the world
• Moral panic
• Culture of fear
• Survivalism: some peoples' response when they become convinced a doomsday scenario is likely to occur
• Doomsday argument: probability says it's coming.

References[edit]

• Sociology
• End of the world
• Religion
• Environmentalism
• Evolution
• Woo
• Science

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