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Aconsensus zombie (or "tea drinker") is a person who doesn't actually work towardsbuilding consensus, butstands in the way of building consensus byinvoking policy andpast consensus, as anappeal to tradition, and supports an irrationalfalse compromise in content disputes, rather than working towards a rational consensus.
Several years ago, researchers at theUmbrella Corporation were researchingweapons of mass destruction, with an emphasis on viruses. The result of their experiments was theTea-virus. Unfortunately, the Tea-virus got out of hand and eventually rippled across Wikipedia, creating vast mobs ofbrain-hungry zombies. In response to this chaos, anelite team of admins was created to fight the infection, and they are supported byWikiFauna withclue.
If you have a large brain and are capable of thinking critically, beware! You are particularly at risk. Consensus zombies survive on a daily diet of neural tissue, and the larger and healthier brains are more delicious and nutritious (seeBrain food).
There are three levels of zombies:Level 1: act and look like humans, and those ones we protect.Level 2: Look and act like humans, but have no conscience or soul. They are very violent.Level 3: Try to look and act like us, but can't. They are the most dangerous among the zombies. They tend to have disgusting looking teeth, and lots of dead skin...
Consensus zombies have only one weak spot: the brain. Youmust attack the brain. There is no other way to bring them down.
Editors mustload their weapons with the bestammunition they can find andfire as quickly and accurately as they can, directly towards the brain of the consensus zombie. Because they are theundead, it may take several volleys for you to be successful, and you might even beunsuccessful, whereby they will continue to chant, "Consensus... Ungh... Consensus... Ungh..." as they rip you to pieces and you can do nothing but howl in pain.
A word of caution, however: while it may be tempting to do so and seem like an easy way out,don't use explosive munitions. When zombiesexplode, they give offa noxious and poisonous gas that isextremely lethal (see alsoWikipedia is not a battleground andNo angry mastodons).
Editors who wish to fight the Wikipedian undead should alsowork together as much as possible and seek shelter at theReliable sources noticeboard,Fringe theories noticeboard, andespecially theVillage pump for policy discussion. If we all scramble and try to take them on here and there, we won't get anywhere. We have to work together.
Good luck!
If you are a WikiZombie and wish to identify yourself, place the userbox on your user page:
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