Alove marriage is one which is driven solely by the couple, with or without consent of their parents, as opposed toarranged marriage.[1] While there is no clear definition of love marriage, the term was in common use globally during theVictorian era.[1] It is still used in theCommonwealth countries ofIndia,Pakistan,Bangladesh andSri Lanka, as well asNepal andEgypt.[2][3]
According to the American historianStephanie Coontz, marriages betweenAnglo-Saxons were organised to establish peace and trading relationships. She writes that in the 11th century, marriages were organised on the basis of securing economic advantages or political ties, and the wishes of the couples were not considered important. The bride was especially expected to defer to her father's wishes. Coontz has argued that while love marriages were not universal, marriages based on love and personal commitments started to emerge as early as the 14th century and really began to flower in the 1700s.[4]
In 1140,Decretum Gratiani was written by Gratian. It made consent of the couple a requirement for marriage. The book became the foundation of the policy of theChristian Church on marriage.[5]
The 1840 marriage ofQueen Victoria andPrince Albert made love marriage more acceptable in the minds of the British public in theVictoria era, and love marriages were on the rise.[5]
In India, love marriages started becoming popular in urban areas in the 1970s. Initially, love marriages occurred between acceptable communities. Love marriage now commonly transcendethnic, community and religion barriers.
In a 2012 survey conducted byIpsos for the TV channelNDTV, 74% of the respondents said that they preferred an arranged marriage.[6] In 2010, theNational Commission for Women (NCW) released a report stating that it had documented 326 cases ofhonour crime in the past year, majority of which were due tointer-caste marriages.[7]
In a 2014 survey conducted by theUnited Nations Population Fund and International Center for Research on Women, 11.7% of men and 8.5% of women surveyed claimed that they chose their partners and married with or without the consent of their families.[8] The boundaries between the two types have started to blur.[1] The termlove-arranged marriage is used to describe a new emerging form of marriage which contains elements of botharranged marriage and love marriage.[9] Love marriages are seen as imposition of the younger generation's will over the older generation's wishes.[1][10]
In Pakistan, arranged marriages are the norm and love marriage is rare in the society. Several cases ofhonour killing are recorded every year.[11] In most cases, the woman is killed, however in some cases couples are killed.[12] TheHuman Rights Commission of Pakistan counted about 869 such cases reported in the media, but noted that many such cases may also be unreported.[13]
In Bangladesh, there is a strong code of social and cultural prohibition on inter-gender friendship and/or romantic relationship; there have been so many incidents ofunrequited love of boys, in the context of unrequited love, boys may face punishment bymob justice on the request of the girl whom the boy loves or the girl's guardians[14] and in the case of romantic relationship of two individuals, they secretly meet and talk, and mayelope if their respective guardians are not willing to get them married.[15][16][17][18]
Due to a large portion of society's Islamic adherence and conservative mentality, inter-gender friendship and romance is heavily suppressed. It is also very difficult to form a romantic relationship or to find a life partner by one's own will. It is generally hard for boys to find life-partners; they need to become earners as Bangladeshi society is very conservative and patriarchal.[19] The society largely relies on thearranged marriage system.[20][21]
There are strong records of guardian objections for various reasons whether the boy is not liked by the girl's parents or the boy is unemployed or of lower income status etc. In this case, the girl is forcibly married to a boy of her parents' choice, and if the girl elopes with another boy, her parents may file a police case against the boy. This social and cultural trend is still prevalent in Bangladeshi society.[19][22] Some couples may commit suicide for not being supported by their families and society.[18]
InEgypt, love marriages, especiallyinterfaith marriages, are generally considered socially unacceptable. Interfaith marriages are often seen as a tactic to recruit members from other religions. Such marriages sometimes result insectarian violence. According to Egyptian law, a man from another religion must convert toIslam to marry a Muslim woman. However, a Christian woman may marry a Muslim man without converting, but officials require the woman to produce a letter of approval from her church, which is rarely granted.[23]
Society is becoming more Westernised, too: this is a love marriage, not one arranged by the family.
The couple say that they entered Pakistan illegally about three weeks ago and had a secret love marriage.