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To prove his globetrotter prowess, Gerhard "randomly" selectsThailand (initiallySiberia, but the less-than-enthused traveler cuts to the former) as the first adventure for the show. He first visits some spots inBangkok, where he receives a painfulThai massage, views the world's largestReclining Buddha, goes for a ride in a rickshaw in a manner similar toTaxicab Confessions, and performs in acomedy club. While at the club, he is treated to a bathroom massage which causes him to becomepee shy. The shame of this condition plagues him for the length of the episode. He then visits astrip club where he witnesses the "ping pong ball trick" and, unable to pay his tab, is forced to perform it himself. Gerhard then travels to the hills ofChiang Mai where he visits a local tribe and participates inMuay Thai (a Thai martial art), becomes sick riding an elephant, and is rendered inaudible by a waterfall. Gerhard conducts a highly comicalreenactment of the story ofBuddha to better understand the region and its signature religion.Koh Samui and the Big Buddha Temple is the show's next destination, however, observing the custom of removing one's footwear is hindered by Gerhard's fear of the fungi and bacteria likely inhabiting the grounds. Instead, he chooses to enter the holy place wearing over-sized novelty feet. After conversing inNorwegian with aDutch man about the quality of theFinnish people, Gerhard travels toKoh Phi Phi where he encounters several animals, engages in a flatulence contest with an elephant, and goessnorkeling, where he is chased by an aggressive, though small,jellyfish. Feeling that the island's very name is mocking his bashful bladder, he takes refuge in nearbyKoh Hip Pi, where he witnesses rocks shaped like genitalia, learns tomeditate, and practicestai chi. In a shaming experience, Gerhard is unable to urinate on his own foot after treading on a sea urchin; instead a complete stranger provides his urine to relieve the pain. Gerhard's last stop isKo Pha Ngan, where he attends the monthlyFull Moon Party, a hot-spot for travelers. The day following the party, Gerhard overcomes his "stage fright" and lets forth his stream into the ocean. Outtakes are shown over theclosing credits of the episode which include Gerhard slipping over in an outdoor shower and being charged by awater buffalo.

Gerhard Reinke travels to the Emerald Isle in hopes of realizing his lifelong dream of becoming the world's next greatest novelist. Gerhard is an admirer of the country's rich literary tradition which included writers such asJames Joyce,Samuel Beckett,Oscar Wilde and, quite erroneously,Dean Koontz though having never actually read any of their works. After visiting a local writers museum Gerhard begins his novel, which focuses on a traveler bent on satisfying women with his impressive "erotic arsenal". At a visit to theGuinness Brewery he learns much about the process of beer making, including the mystery ofyeast, enjoys a free pint and encounters the Johnson sisters, the world's second tallestidentical twins who would soon factor into hiserotica. Gerhard then partakes in a traditionalIrish stepdance and professes his love forRiverdance. In an attempt to provide anetymology lesson, Gerhard reveals that many English words actually originated from Irish towns, the examples beingLimerick ("a bawdy form of poetry"),Donnybrook ("a drunken brawl") andCunnilingus ("to French kiss a woman's vagina"). Gerhard subsequently visits theRock of Cashel at the same time taking shots at the "disappointing" Nicolas Cage and Sean Connery ("in a wig") movieThe Rock, and the city ofCork where he stays in an eccentric bed and breakfast and encountershooligans. Gerhard's next stop isBlarney Castle where he hopes to receive the gift of gab by kissing the famousBlarney Stone, but he is instead stricken with acold sore which draws ridicule from the public and forces him to heal for two weeks inBarbados. Upon return toCounty Kerry, Gerhard playsgolf with aCatholic priest who is less than amused with his on-course antics. InDoolin, a town famous for its music, Reinke attempts to incorporate thetheremin into the traditional folk sounds. At Dingle, Gerhard takes in the views of thebeehive houses and Fungi the Dingle Dolphin before a thumb injury sidelines him in Barbados once again. Though Gerhard finally decides to buckle down on his book he comes down with extremewriter's block and begins pub crawling in efforts to find himself. It only worsens as he drinks himself into a coma lasting some 24 days and incurs minor brain damage. Afterphysical therapy and encouragement from those around him, he finishes his book "Irish Wood" which isself-published in the end.

Gerhard becomes addicted to Coca leaves, and is kidnapped by the rebel group P.U.B.E (pronounced "pooh-bay"). There, Gerhard would be tapped to direct the P.U.B.E. training video, "Days of Pain and Victory." Upon release from the P.U.B.E. compound, Gerhard heads to Copacabana, along the shores of Lake Titicaca, in which he plans a snorkeling adventure only to discover, too late, its freezing temperature. Here Gerhard would visit a healer, hoping to find assistance with his coca leaf problem. It is from this healer that Gerhard receives the magic idol, Joselito. After a trip to Cusco for the Incan Festival of the Sun, Gerhard visitsMachu Picchu, the wonder of which confounds Gerhard's English and German vocabularies, and forces him to use the Spanish wordimpressivo to convey the spectacle. In a closing number, Gerhard finally faces his coca addiction head-on, and wins, with now-enabler Joselito falling dramatically to his death.

Gerhard makes his way from Los Angeles to Humboldt. His journey begins in fashionable Venice Beach and on to Malibu, where he is attacked by Steven Spielberg with a baseball bat. He visits Disneyland, Silicon Valley, and a Danish village, survives an avalanche, drives through a redwood tree, and temporarily adopts an orphan dog, Zeppel. Gerhard soon decides it would be highly profitable to hunt for the elusive Bigfoot. Side-tracked in Garberville, Gerhard would join a band of hippies for tree hugging and a smoke-filled drum circle that would leave our hero paranoid and alienated. Pushing on alone to Willowcreek, A.K.A. Bigfoot Central, Gerhard learns more about the elusive cold-weather ape Bigfoot, and the impossible-to-replicate compliant gait. In the finale, Gerhard solves the mystery of Bigfoot and finds a home for Zeppel.

Gerhard travels the Amazon, hoping to uncover the mystery of the disappearance of his great-grandfather, the great explorer and pioneer behind the world's first non-spurious dicking creme, Helmut Reinke. Highlights include a taxidermy exhibit, a wildlife park (featuring anirascible monkey and a stunt-performing sloth), and visits to many native villages. Gerhard is also taken on a 'spirit journey' to communicate with his long-lost great-grandfather by an aboriginal medicine man, however, the great-grandfather who appears is not Gerhard's. Throughout the episode Gerhard is repeatedly attacked by the monkey from the wildlife park. The show ends with an unexpected turn, to at long last complete the legend of Helmut Reinke.

A brief bout of food poisoning, meeting a shaman who attempts to steal Gerhard's kidney whilst under the influence of dung from a peyote-eating coyote, becoming catatonic after using a machismo tester, and buying a foam iguana from a man named Froggy.