Thecoital imperative is the idea or belief thatpenile–vaginal intercourse (PIV) is the defining practice in asexual relationship. It's often taken for granted that intercourse is the primary, natural, and most desirable form of sexual activity, particularly within heterosexual sex.[1][2] This idea makes anything else erotically charged is expected to be “preliminary foreplay” or a fun bonus rather than sex in itself.[3]
While the coital imperative is widely held, there are growing calls to challenge it by promotingnoncoital sexual practices as valid and enjoyable options, largely due to the normalization of modernsex education.[4]
Historically, the termssex andcoitus have been misused as if they were synonymous. Coitus is one of the many practices that can occur in a sex relationship (in addition tofondling,kissing,mutual masturbation, andoral sex) in which thepenis is inserted into thevagina oranus. This confusion between the terms has led to practices in which penetration is not involved being denied the name and status ofsex or to them not being considered a means of achieving pleasure ororgasm. The term has also been linked to the concept ofphallocentrism—that is, the reduction of the male body to the penis— by minimizing other sensitive and pleasure zones and emotionality, attributes necessary for harmonious relationships within a couple.[5]
Researchers often use the termsex to refer to penile-vaginal intercourse, while using specific words for other sexual behaviors. Scholars Richard M. Lerner and Laurence Steinberg state that researchers also "rarely reveal" how they conceptualize sex "or even whether they have resolved potential discrepancies" in conceptualizations of sex, and attribute researchers' focus on penile-vaginal sex to "the larger culture's preoccupation with this form of sexual activity." This focus may also relegate other forms of mutual sexual activity to mislabeled foreplay or contribute to their failure to be considered "real sex," and limits the meaning ofrape.[6] It may also be that the conceptual conflation of sexual activity with vaginal intercourse and sexual function hinders and limits reporting on sexual behavior that non-heterosexual people can have, or reporting on heterosexuals who may engage in non-vaginal sexual activity.[7]
This belief is deeply rooted in all cultures of society and is often intertwined with traditionalgender roles and expectations about relationships and sexuality.[2] For example, in theWest, theJudeo-Christian tradition has been linked to the coital imperative. According to this tradition, sex is valid only within marriage and becomes a means of expressing intimate feelings, assuming responsibilities, and, above all, reproducing the species.[2]
The coital imperative of mixed-sex couples has often been credited as a major contributor to theorgasm gap; multiple studies on sexual behavior and attitudes have concluded that many of these couples prioritize penetration and the men's satisfaction (since women lack vaginal sensitivity), suggesting that this is a social and cultural issue.[8]
When researchers use the termsex, they nearly always mean sexual intercourse – more specifically, penile–vaginal intercourse... The widespread, unquestioned equation of penile–vaginal intercourse with sex reflects a failure to examine systematically 'whether the respondent's understanding of the question matches what the researcher had in mind.'
To most people,sex means vaginal intercourse. But the clitoris sits apart from the vagina, an inch or so above the vaginal opening.
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