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In 18th- and 19th-centuryItaly, thecicisbeo (UK:/ˌtʃɪtʃɪzˈbeɪoʊ/CHITCH-iz-BAY-oh,[1]US:/ˌtʃiːtʃ-/CHEE-chiz-,[2]Italian:[tʃitʃiˈzbɛːo];plural:cicisbei) orcavalier servente (French:chevalier servant) was the man who was the professed gallant or lover[3] of a woman married to someone else. With the knowledge and consent of the husband, the cicisbeo attended his mistress at public entertainments,[4] to church and other occasions, and had privileged access to this woman. The arrangement is comparable to theSpanishcortejo orestrecho and, to a lesser degree, to theFrenchpetit-maître.[5]
The exactetymology of the word is unknown; some evidence suggests it originally meant "in a whisper"[6] (perhaps anonomatopeic word). Other accounts suggest it is an inversion ofbel cece,[7] which means "beautiful chick (pea)". According to theOxford English Dictionary, the first recorded usage of the term in English was found in a letter byLady Mary Wortley Montagu dated 1718. The term appears in Italian in Giovanni Maria Muti'sQuaresimale Del Padre Maestro Fra Giovanni Maria Muti De Predicatori of 1708 (p. 734).
This arrangement, called thecicisbeatura orcicisbeismo, was widely practised, especially among thenobility of theItalian cities ofGenoa,Nice,Venice,Florence andRome.[8] While many contemporary references tocicisbei and descriptions of their social standing exist,[9] scholars diverge on the exact nature of the phenomenon.[10] Some maintain that this institution was defined by marriage contracts,[11] others question this claim and see it as a peculiarity of 18th-century customs that is not well defined or easily explained.[12] Other scholars see it as a sign of the increasing emancipation of aristocratic women in the 18th century.[13]
Thecicisbeo was better tolerated if he was known to behomosexual.Louise d'Épinay wrote from Paris to her friendFerdinando Galiani about the impending departure of marchese Alvise Mocenigo, the Venetian ambassador, whose tastes the ambassador had displayed in Paris:
Nothing equals the friendly companionship afforded to a woman by men of those persuasions. To the rest of you, so full of yourselves, one can't say a word that you don't take as provocation. ... Whereas with those gentlemen one knows quite well that they want no more of us than we of them—one feels in no danger and deliciously free"[14]
Regardless of its roots and technicalities, the custom was firmly entrenched. Typically, husbands tolerated or even welcomed the arrangement:Lord Byron, for example, wascicisbeo toTeresa, Contessa Guiccioli. After Byron's death, the Contessa's second husband, the Marquis de Boissy, was known to brag about the fact,[15] introducing her as "Madame la Marquise de Boissy, autrefois la Maitresse de Milord Byron" (the Marquise de Boissy, formerly the mistress of Lord Byron). Byron also famously analyzed the institution from anEnglish point of view in his poemBeppo. Attempts by the husband to ward off prospectivecicisbei or disapproval of the practice in general was likely to be met with ridicule and scorn:
... for, you must understand, this Italian fashion prevails at Nice among all ranks of people; and there is not such a passion as jealousy known. The husband and thecicisbeo live together as sworn brothers; and the wife and the mistress embrace each other with marks of the warmest affection.[16]
[E]very married lady in this country has hercicisbeo, orservente, who attends her every where on all occasions, and upon whose privileges the husband dares not encroach, without incurring the censure and ridicule of the whole community.[17]
Cicisbei played by set rules, generally avoiding public displays of affection. At public entertainments, they would typically stand behind their seated mistress and whisper in her ear.[8] Customs of the time did not permit them to engage in relationships with any other women during their free time, making the arrangement rather demanding. Either party could decide to end the relationship at any time. A woman's formercicisbei were calledspiantati (literallypenniless,destroyed), or cast-offs.[15]
The topic can be found in the contemporary poemIl Giorno (1763) byGiuseppe Parini. Other works from the period which make use of the topic include:
Citations
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Media related toCicisbeo at Wikimedia Commons