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Genesis 31:14,15
And Rachel and Leah answered and said unto him,Is there yet any portion or inheritance for us in our father's house? …

1 Samuel 20:30-34
Then Saul's anger was kindled against Jonathan, and he said unto him, Thou son of the perverse rebelliouswoman, do not I know that thou hast chosen the son of Jesse to thine own confusion, and unto the confusion of thy mother's nakedness? …

Colossians 3:21
Fathers, provoke not your childrento anger, lest they be discouraged.

but.

Genesis 18:19
For I know him, that he will command his children and his household after him, and they shall keep the way of the LORD, to do justice and judgment; that the LORD may bring upon Abraham that which he hath spoken of him.

Exodus 12:26,27
And it shall come to pass, when your children shall say unto you, What mean ye by this service? …

Exodus 13:14,15
And it shall be when thy son asketh thee in time to come, saying, Whatis this? that thou shalt say unto him, By strength of hand the LORD brought us out from Egypt, from the house of bondage: …

instead, bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.
The phrase "bring them up" implies a nurturing process, akin to the care a gardener provides to plants, ensuring they grow strong and healthy. "Discipline" here refers to training and correction that aligns with God's principles, as seen inProverbs 22:6, which advises training a child in the way they should go. "Instruction of the Lord" points to teaching children about God's ways, commandments, and the gospel of Jesus Christ. This reflects the Shema inDeuteronomy 6:6-7, where parents are instructed to teach God's commandments diligently to their children. The focus is on a holistic upbringing that integrates faith into daily life, preparing children to live according to Christian values.

Ephesians addresses dads directly: “Fathers”. God appoints you as the primary shepherd of the home. •Deuteronomy 6:6-7 shows fathers impressing God’s words on their children daily. •Proverbs 4:1 pictures a dad saying, “Listen, my sons, to a father’s instruction.” •Joshua 24:15 sets the example: “As for me and my house, we will serve the LORD.” Your leadership shapes the spiritual climate more than any program or church activity.

The warning is negative first: don’t stir up anger. •Colossians 3:21 echoes it: “Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.” • Over-critical words (Proverbs 12:18), inconsistent rules (Proverbs 15:1), favoritism, or hypocrisy kindle resentment. Practical checkpoints:

– Watch tone: firmness without harshness.

– Match discipline to offense; avoid over-punishment.

– Keep promises; broken words breed bitterness.

God never leaves a vacuum; He redirects. The “instead” shifts us from what to avoid toward what to pursue. LikeRomans 12:21, “Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.” Trade irritation for nurturing, frustration for cultivation.

The phrase pictures continual, patient nurturing until full maturity. •Proverbs 22:6 says to “train up a child in the way he should go.” •Psalm 127:3-5 calls children “a heritage from the LORD,” arrows to be shaped for flight. •1 Thessalonians 2:11-12 compares parenting to gentle exhortation that guides children to “walk in a manner worthy of God.” Growing kids isn’t a weekend project; it’s steady care.

“Discipline” means structured training that corrects and guides. •Proverbs 13:24 insists loving parents “discipline” their kids. •Hebrews 12:5-11 shows God disciplining us “for our good, that we may share in His holiness.” Practical tools:

– Clear rules anchored in Scripture.

– Consistent consequences, never in anger.

– Positive reinforcement celebrating obedience.

Instruction targets the mind and heart with God’s truth. •Deuteronomy 11:18-19 urges parents to teach God’s words “when you sit at home and when you walk along the road.” •2 Timothy 3:15 reminds Timothy he knew the Scriptures “from infancy.” Ideas:

– Read a short Bible passage at meals and discuss.

– Memorize verses together (Psalm 119:11).

– Let children see you seeking counsel from God’s Word (Psalm 1:2).

Ephesians 6:4 calls fathers to reject provoking, resent-producing parenting and embrace patient, loving formation. Lead intentionally, correct consistently, and saturate your home with God’s Word. When discipline and instruction flow from a heart aligned with Christ, children glimpse the Father’s own character and are drawn to love and obey Him.

Nurture and admonition of the Lord.--In this phrase we have the two elements of education. "Nurture" is a word signifying generally "the treatment due to a child," but by usage appropriated to practical training, or teaching by discipline; while "admonition" is the "putting children in mind" by word of instruction. It may be noted that in accordance with the characteristic sternness of ancient education, both words have a tinge of severity in them. The "nurture" of this passage is the same as the "chastening" of the famous passage inHebrews 12:4-11. (Compare the cognate verb inLuke 23:16;1Corinthians 11:32;2Corinthians 6:9;1Timothy 1:20;Revelation 3:19.) The "admonition" is used inTitus 3:10 for rebuke, and, inasmuch as it implies warning, is distinguished from teaching inColossians 3:16. In this, as in other cases, Christianity gradually softened this stern authority of the father--so strikingly exemplified in the old Roman law--by the idea suggested in the addition of the phrase "of the Lord." The children belong not to the parent only, but to Christ, taken into His arms in baptism, and sealed as His little ones. Hence the "reverence," which Juvenal enforced in theory as due to children's natural purity, become realised in Christian practice, and gradually transformed all Christian education to greater gentleness, forbearance, and love. . . .