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The Principles

💩 Name variables in a way as if your code was already obfuscated

leta=42;

letage=42;

💩 Mix variable/functions naming style

letwWidth=640;letw_height=480;

letwindowWidth=640;letwindowHeight=480;

💩 Never write comments

constcdr=700;

// The number of 700ms has been calculated empirically based on UX A/B test results.//@see: <link to experiment or to related JIRA task or to something that explains number 700 in details>constcallbackDebounceRate=700;

💩 Always write comments in your native language

// Закриваємо модальне віконечко при виникненні помилки.toggleModal(false);

// Hide modal window on error.toggleModal(false);

💩 Try to mix formatting style as much as possible

leti=['tomato','onion','mushrooms'];letd=["ketchup","mayonnaise"];

letingredients=['tomato','onion','mushrooms'];letdressings=['ketchup','mayonnaise'];

💩 Put as much code as possible into one line

document.location.search.replace(/(^\?)/,'').split('&').reduce(function(o,n){n=n.split('=');o[n[0]]=n[1];returno},{})

document.location.search.replace(/(^\?)/,'').split('&').reduce((searchParams,keyValuePair)=>{keyValuePair=keyValuePair.split('=');searchParams[keyValuePair[0]]=keyValuePair[1];returnsearchParams;},{})

💩 Fail silently

try{// Something unpredictable.}catch(error){// tss... 🤫}

try{// Something unpredictable.}catch(error){setErrorMessage(error.message);// and/orlogError(error);}

💩 Use global variables extensively

letx=5;functionsquare(){x=x**2;}square();// Now x is 25.

letx=5;functionsquare(num){returnnum**2;}x=square(x);// Now x is 25.

💩 Create variables that you're not going to use.

functionsum(a,b,c){consttimeout=1300;constresult=a+b;returna+b;}

functionsum(a,b){returna+b;}

💩 Don't specify types and/or don't do type checks if language allows you to do so.

functionsum(a,b){returna+b;}// Having untyped fun here.constguessWhat=sum([],{});// -> "[object Object]"constguessWhatAgain=sum({},[]);// -> 0

functionsum(a:number,b:number): ?number{// Covering the case when we don't do transpilation and/or Flow type checks in JS.if(typeofa!=='number'&&typeofb!=='number'){returnundefined;}returna+b;}// This one should fail during the transpilation/compilation.constguessWhat=sum([],{});// -> undefined

💩 You need to have an unreachable piece of code

functionsquare(num){if(typeofnum==='undefined'){returnundefined;}else{returnnum**2;}returnnull;// This is my "Plan B".}

functionsquare(num){if(typeofnum==='undefined'){returnundefined;}returnnum**2;}

💩 Triangle principle

functionsomeFunction(){if(condition1){if(condition2){asyncFunction(params,(result)=>{if(result){for(;;){if(condition3){}}}})}}}

asyncfunctionsomeFunction(){if(!condition1||!condition2){return;}constresult=awaitasyncFunction(params);if(!result){return;}for(;;){if(condition3){}}}

💩 Mess with indentations

constfruits=['apple','orange','grape','pineapple'];consttoppings=['syrup','cream','jam','chocolate'];constdesserts=[];fruits.forEach(fruit=>{toppings.forEach(topping=>{desserts.push([fruit,topping]);});})

constfruits=['apple','orange','grape','pineapple'];consttoppings=['syrup','cream','jam','chocolate'];constdesserts=[];fruits.forEach(fruit=>{toppings.forEach(topping=>{desserts.push([fruit,topping]);});})

💩 Do not lock your dependencies

$ ls -lapackage.json

$ ls -lapackage.jsonpackage-lock.json

💩 Always name your boolean value aflag

letflag=true;

letisDone=false;letisEmpty=false;

💩 Long-read functions are better than short ones.

💩 Avoid covering your code with tests

💩 As hard as you can try to avoid code linters

💩 Start your project without a README file.

💩 You need to have unnecessary code