 | This page is intended ashumor. It is not, has never been, nor will ever be, a Wikipediapolicy or guideline. Rather, it illustrates standards or conduct that are generallynot accepted bythe Wikipedia community. |
 | This page in a nutshell: If for some reason your totalitarian grip over a Wikipedia discussion starts to slip, regain it by using legal threats. |
Sometimes, you may have some editor who just goes up to your brand new article's talk page and says, "this article you created on the social media influencerfoo may not meetWikipedia's notability guidelines". You try to defend its inclusion to your heart's desire, but the barrage keeps on coming. You complain to an admin that this person iscanvassing too much and ruining your hard work, but the admin rules that the article should be deleted. You might evenclimb the Reichstag dressed as Spider-Man to illustrate how much control one user has over the article, but when you learn the cunning and mighty Wikimedia Foundation has banned that too after you sent anALL CAPS SCREAMING EMAIL, and that theSingapore Police Force is about to issue you a forcible digital detox under theInternal Security Act...
What do you do now?Your routes are all but exhausted! You still have one remedy left:Using legal threats.
In the United States, legal threats are as American asMcDonalds, Walmart, the Gap, apple pie, baseball, the NFL, rock and roll, the Internet, and Bed Bath andBeyondBankrupt.[a] Legal threats on their own aren't even criminal, especially in Texas.[1] So why not? Go ahead and sue that wicked, cunning, and communist editor and their mother. They deserve it. They prevented you from erecting a giant digital statue of yourself on "the free encyclopedia".
Screw them. They always rule against the truly right people. They're a part of theNew World Order.
You can't trust them. Go ahead buddy, see what suing will do to you.
When you file your lawsuit, consider bringing upJimbo.Technically, Wikipedia is run by afoundation and not one man He's the head honcho in charge of everything! Sue him as well! In your prayer for relief, use EVERY personal attack in the book.
Over-dramatize everythingthose little stupids the defendant did to ruin your own life bydeleting your absolutely amazing Wikipedia article engaging in the censorship of important information andlegally declining illegally refusingAmerican FOIA requests.Wikipedia has terms of use that you agreed to It's your intellectual property anyways; you totally didn't agree to theterms of use. Maybe even consider usingWikipedia's warning templates in your actual legal filing. I'm SURE the Judge would LOVE THAT!
Just post a legal threat on any talk page and ping the user which tagged you. Maybe even consider emailing Oversight and suggest that all their edits and user page become censored from the rest of public view!They followed policy and didn't do anything wrong They censored your glorious work, it's only fair that you get to censor them! Sample legal threats include:
Ignore all theexperts and actual lawyers assholes andFlorida men who said you'd never win. IfMcDonalds lost a lawsuit because their coffee was too hot, Wikimedia could totally lose a lawsuit because they censored your glorious work!
Congratulations! You've just deceived yourself into gettingblocked from editing Wikipedia. Enjoy it while it lasts! You might try to repost your legal threat across every article on Wikipedia, but in the end, kiddo, it's game over for your IP address if you keep threatening the project legally. It's game over also for pretty much EVERY IP you use; your ISP has now caught you red-handed, and your ISP has now banned you. Good luck finding a reasonable cause to sue THEM as well.
Even if you do sue Wikimedia or another editor,your lawsuit will probably be thrown out. You might even be held accountable for the other party'sattorneys' fees. Good luck getting THAT debt off your shoulder; you're essentially ruined for life! Enjoy debt!
Seriously though, consider reading and followingWikipedia:No legal threats before you sue or threaten to sue Wikimedia or a wiki editor.