"In the Workhouse: Christmas Day", better known as "Christmas Day in the Workhouse", is a dramaticmonologue written as aballad by campaigning journalistGeorge Robert Sims and first published inThe Referee for the Christmas of 1877.[2] It appeared in Sims' regularMustard and Cress column under the pseudonymDagonet and was collected in book form in 1881 as one ofThe Dagonet Ballads,[2] which sold over 100,000 copies within a year.[3]
It is a criticism of the harsh conditions in English and Welshworkhouses under the1834 Poor Law.[4] As a popular and sentimentalmelodrama, the work has beenparodied many times.[4]
It is Christmas Day in the Workhouse,
And the cold bare walls are bright
With garlands of green andholly,
And the place is a pleasant sight;
For with clean-washed hands and faces,
In a long and hungry line
The paupers sit at the tables,
For this is the hour they dine.
And the guardians and their ladies,
Although the wind is east,
Have come in their furs and wrappers,
To watch their charges feast;
To smile and be condescending,
Put pudding on pauper plates,
To be hosts at the workhouse banquet
They've paid for—with the rates.[5]
— Lines 1-16, as reprinted inThe Dragonet Ballads (1879)
The poem tells of an oldDevon trader named John who has been reduced to poverty and so must eat at the workhouse on Christmas Day. To the shock of theguardians and master of the workhouse, he reviles them for the events of the previous Christmas when his wife, Nance, was starving. They could not afford food so, for the first time, he went to the workhouse but was told that food would not be given out – they would have to come in to eat. At that time, families might be separated inside such institutions but his wife refused to be parted from her husband of fifty years on Christmas Day. He went out again in search of scraps but she died before he returned and so now he is bitter at the memory.[4][6]
Christmas Day in the Workhouse was for a time vigorously denounced as a mischievous attempt to set the paupers against their betters, but when a well-known social reformer died recently I read in several papers that he always declared that it was readingChristmas Day in the Workhouse which started him on his ceaseless campaign for old age pensions, a campaign which he lived to see crowned with victory.
Sims was acampaigning journalist who, while young, had investigated the poor ofLondon's East End.[8] The details in this ballad were perhaps not accurate, as the Poor Law regulations did permit old couples to cohabit and allow for short-term relief to be given out,[9] but its melodramatic and sentimental style made it very popular and such work made Sims a great success.[8] He went on to write detailed exposés of the life of the poor for periodicals such as theWeekly Dispatch,The Pictorial World andThe Daily News, which had been founded byCharles Dickens.[8]
Among the manyparodies of Sims' ballad are "Christmas Day in the Cookhouse" (1930) by British comedianBilly Bennett, recited by a soldier in the 1969 filmOh! What a Lovely War;[10] "'Twas Christmas Day in the Poorhouse" (2000) byGarrison Keillor;[11] and "Christmas Day in Grey Gables", submitted by a listener to theBBC Radio 4'sThe Archers message board.[12]
It was Christmas Day in thecookhouse, the happiest day of the year[13]
Mens hearts were full of gladness, and their bellies full of beer
When up popped Private Shorty, his face as bold as brass
He said "you can take yourChristmas pudding
And stick it up your....."
Tidings of comfort and joy, comfort and joy
O, tidings of comfort and joy
It was Christmas day in theharem, theeunuchs were standing round
While hundreds ofbeautiful women lay stretched out on the ground
When in strolled thebold bad Sultan, and gazed at hismarble halls
He asked "what do you want for Christmas, boys?"
And the eunuchs answered:
Tidings of comfort and joy, comfort and joy
O, tidings of comfort and joy
An abbreviated and bawdily modified version, entitled "Christmas in the Workhaus", is recited by Edward Asner's character in the 1977, made for Christmas TV movie,The Gathering (1977 film). Although the poem is erroneously attributed Rudyard Kipling, instead of George Robert Sims-(with comically censored words, here initalics with a *);
" Oh, It was Christmas in the Workhaus- the best day of the year. ...And the paupers were all happy- for their guts was full of beer.
The Master of the Workhaus strolled them dismal halls. ...And the paupers answered *balls.
The Master grew angry and swore by all the gods. ...They'd have no Christmas pudding- the lousy *sods.
Up sprang a war-scarred veteran, who stormed the Kyber Pass. ...We don't want your Christmas pudding and *you can shove it up your A**.[14]
In The Workhouse: Christmas Day public domain audiobook atLibriVox (multiple versions)Poor laws of the British Isles | ||
|---|---|---|
| Poor laws by territory |  Nantwich workhouse | |
| Old Poor Law | ||
| Relief systems | ||
| New Poor Law | ||
| Changes after 1834 | ||
| Decline and abolition | ||
| Other | ||
